Our Stories & Voices: Ellie

Content Warning(s): solicitation of sexual behavior, intimate partner abuse, threatened suicide.

Submitted for Sexual Assault Awareness Month - Our Voices & Stories.

"The worst experience I've probably had, and the one that had the longest lasting impact, was actually with a then coworker. We were chatting and I told him how I liked anime and went to ****** and have a small kimono collection. He got creepy fast and started telling me how he dreamed and fantasized about me wearing kimono and stripping for him, even after I told him I didn't want to hear it he'd keep telling me and kept trying to pressure me into having sex with him.

This would become my abusive ex, because he started threatening to kill himself if I wouldn't go out with him. We dated about a year, and when I finally broke up with him he told me I couldn't do that, that we both had to agree on the breakup, and went around telling everyone that we were still together, and his friends started calling me and messaging me on MySpace to tell me how horrible I was for daring to break up with him."

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Ellie, we're so sorry this happened to you. We hope you understand that the threat of violence/suicide was not your fault, and that coercion was not your consent regardless of whether or not you were dating this person. Further, the harassment you experienced after you broke up was also not your fault and not warranted. Please remember that you're not alone.

-Ellie